Friday, July 1, 2011

The Good Husband

On my way home from work this afternoon, my mind was racing with all of the things I needed to do tonight. Pack up books and DVDs for tomorrow's yard sale at my dad's house, pack a bag so that I could shower and dress there for a dinner Hubby and I are going to right after and go to Target to pick up a couple of things.  I decided that Target was first on my list.

So, I grabbed my purse and raided Hubby's wallet for some cash.  On my way to the car, I stopped in the garage to tell Hubby where I was going and this is how it went...

Me: "I'm going to Target to pick up a couple of things."

Hubby: "What are you getting?"

Me: "I need a new, cute top. Nothing fancy, but something that doesn't look like it's been attacked by the garage or the yard."

Hubby: "How are you paying for it?"

Me: "Cash."

Hubby: "Where did you get the cash?"

Me: (smiling) "Your wallet."

Hubby: (thinking) "Do me a favor, keep the cash for weekend smokes and stuff but go in and get my credit card to put the new shirt on."

Me: (totally stunned) "Really?"

Hubby: "Yeah."

Me: "OK then."

This, of course, was music to my ears. I hauled myself back into the house and grabbed the credit card. Once I got to Target, I decided on TWO shirts. However, in the end, he lucked out. Once I was back home, I realized that I not only had a shirt in my closet that I liked but I also didn't care for the shirts I bought. So, next week, I guess I'll be taking them back and in the end Hubby will have paid for nothing. Although, if I really think about it, I'm sure I can exchange them for something else I do love. Cuz that's how I roll!

The moral of this story is, I have a good husband and maybe I should rethink all those times I tried to auction him off on Facebook...

Eh, maybe I shouldn't get ahead of myself... This could've just been one of those "moments".


















:)

Thursday, June 9, 2011

The Bucket List

Hey there, Blogger!  Long time, no see!  I know it's been a long time but, I just had to share something I heard/read about today...

SO, this morning, after I'd crossed into Maryland on my way to work, I turned on one of the local radio stations just in time to hear them talking about this blog that they had just linked to their Facebook page.  It's written by this little girl (age 15) who has cancer.  She had recently found out that she was losing the battle so she decided to start this blog about her "Bucket List".  Can you imagine?!  15 years old and doing a Bucket List!  Insanely sad!  Of course, once I got to work, I had to check it out for myself.  The list is so cute.  Nothing fancy...  She's added things that she wanted to do and knows she can't due to her illness and also added things that she knows she can do like getting a massage or someone to do her hair or having a party with her girlfriends.  You can't beat that kind of innocence!

Anyway, the blog was intended for her family and friends.  She only has 4 posts and she now has something like 7,000 followers!  The response was overwhelming!  I can't even do it justice to tell you about it, you have to read it for yourself.  It's just so simple and genuine.  She had no idea she would receive the response she did.  She's even made it very clear that she does not want "charity money" but she is using her new found fame to ask people to sign up as bone marrow participants and having people sponsor her sister in a run for cancer.  Basically, making people AWARE.  I was so touched, I decided to follow her myself.  I pray this child beats it because I know I would cry like a baby when I realize the posts are no longer coming!

I started thinking about my own Bucket List.  It's something I never put much thought into because, basically, I don't want for much.  I'm a homebody.  As long as my stress-level is low, I"m a happy camper!  But when you see something like that, it makes you think.  I guess my bucket list would consist of seeing the beautiful places of the world - Italy, France, The Pyramids, the Asian Pacific and so on...  You can't beat the sight of beautiful places!  So, yeah, I guess I'd like to travel some.  I'd also like to not take for granted the relationships I have with family and friends. 

So, I ask you, what's on YOUR Bucket List?

http://alicepyne.blogspot.com/


Sunday, February 6, 2011

Winter Wine Picks from Pennsyltucky

For the last few weeks, my favorite bloggers have been posting blogs about their winter picks for books to read, movies to see, music to listen to and so on... I thought I should do something similar. I love books, movies, music, TV, etc... However, I also love wine!

Now, by no means, am I any kind of wine connoisseur. I have no idea how to pick out the attributes. You won't see me take a sip and say "Mmm, I taste oak and raspberries". Nope, I just don't have that power. If it's a dry, red with a full, smooth flavor - I'm sold! (Side note: I do know that I like the Merlots and Cabernet-Sauvignons, as well as the "blended reds" all coming from the West Coast.)

Because I can't choose a wine by reading the back label that tells me about the blend, I decided that I should start choosing wines based on the front label. I've made my decisions by "judging a book by it's cover". Cute labels and unique names are the way to go... And so far, I've had much success!

Below are pictures of wines that I've tried so far this winter and totally love! I hope you will try them as well... ENJOY :)


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I was originally sold on the shoes, but a cute name, cute label AND a portion of the purchase is donated to women's charities! What's not to love?! :)


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Dude, this wine has Pennsyltucky written ALL. OVER. IT. It practically screamed my name from it's place on the shelf! "Tina, you hillbilly, get your ass over here and BUY me already!"

(Side note: For those unfamiliar with the term Pennsytucky, please see below)

Pennsyltucky

Often referred to or directed towards the state of Pennsylvania; however the second syllable "tucky" or "tuckey" can also be applied to any state name, akin to the stereotype that Kentucky is full of rednecks and backwoods Bubbas.

(and my personal fav)

Pennsyltucky

Rural parts of Pennsylvania with large concentrations of country folk, noted for interest in Hunting, Country Music, NASCAR, trailer life and Wal-Mart. Often spotted wearing camouflage, driving pickup trucks with gun racks and more cars are seen on lawns than the roads. Cousin sex is acceptable, and New Jersey license plates are generally despised.


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Um, I think the name says it all...


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And last, but not least, why would you not buy a bottle of wine with a COCK on it? HAHAHAAAAA it sells itself!

Bonus points: All bottles are under $15!


Much love from your Favorite Crazy Woman XOXO

Sunday, January 30, 2011

I So Want To Kick This Dude In The Head

I've never been much of a "people person" (Hubby calls me a "social ruhtard") and I tend to keep to myself... Probably because I have too many pet peeves. Just to name a few...

  • Personal Space:  When you're standing in a check-out line and the person behind you is standing so close you can feel their breath on your neck.  Really? Back the fuck up already!
  • All about me "conversations":  A conversation should be two ways... Talk a little about you and talk a little about me (and sometimes, talk about others)... Give and take.  Too often do I spend the majority of my time listening to someone go on and on about themselves and not once do they say "how was your weekend?" or "what's going on with you?".
  • Being talked down to:  FYI? I'm not a moron! It's not necessary for you to give me a play-by-play in anything you talk about unless I specifically ask for it.

So, yesterday morning, I had to run a few errands and because I got a late start, my first stop was the bank.  I walked in and explained to the Banker Dude that I needed a new ATM card.  And that's exactly what I said. Not a Debit or Check card but, an ATM card.  I kind of figured it would explain itself... Apparently, not! As this is where the third bullet point comes into play...

The Banker Dude starts off by saying there's a difference between an ATM card and a Check/Debit card (Um, yes I know).  He broke it down and told me that ATM cards are only to be used at the ATM machines, grocery stores, gas stations and other select stores and that I would need a personal pin to use them. That not all stores would accept "ATM cards" (Again, yes I know). So, once we established the difference between an ATM card and a Debit/Check card he moved on to taking my information for such ATM/Debit/Check card.  And this is how the story goes:

Banker Dude:  "Would you like the card for account #1 or account #2?"

Me:  "Well, I only have one account with your bank so I'm gonna go with account #1."

Banker Dude:  "It says here you have two accounts with us."

Me:  "No, it says that I have one account and I'm the beneficiary of another account. I'm the beneficiary, not the account holder."

Banker Dude: (Looking at me like I'm not very smart) "Well, you may be a beneficiary but it's still considered an account."

Me: "OK, well why don't you give me a card for that account, too, and see what the Account Holder has to say about it?"

Banker Dude: (Huffy) "OK, so account #1."

Me: (thinking "dumbass":) "YUP, account #1."

Banker Dude:  "I see that this is a joint account. Does the other account holder have an ATM/Debit/Check card as well?"

Me:  "Yes? Does that matter? Are we only allowed one ATM/Check/Debit card per account?"

Banker Dude: "Oh, not at all. But, you know that when you have two people on the same account and each has an ATM/Debit/Check Card, you will need to be in sync. If you're not each jotting down your receipts in the check register then next thing you know you're bouncing checks and adding up bank fees."

Me: (staring at him in silence)

*I so want to kick this dude in the head.*

Me:  "I just need an ATM/Debit/Check card."

Banker Dude:  "Well, OK then."

I mean seriously, what IS his problem?  I go in to get an ATM card and come out with a crash-course in Managing Your Finances.  I've never been one to think that a man would talk down to me because I'm a woman or I look a certain way (believe me, I know some people that think this. They swear it's because they're a woman or even funnier... short.) but more because they have some little dick superiority complex. The kind of person that feels the need to control everything or just likes to hear themselves talk.  And I knew that this was exactly this dudes deal because after all was finished, I got up to leave and he shook my hand and said the following...

Banker Dude:  "Be careful out there in this weather.  Who knows if we'll get any accumulation.  Times like this, I take my kids' car keys from them.  I don't let them drive in any kind of weather.  They get mad but, they'll realize I'm trying to keep them safe and thank me for it later."

I swear, if this man was my father, I'd take the easy way out and plow my car into a concrete wall going 80 mph before he got a chance to take away my car keys... Asshole!!!

Maybe, I should just stick to having Hubby tag-along with me to things like this... When he's in the company of morons, he likes to address these idiots with words like "Champ" and "Boss" and "Chief"... I'm so amused because I know that the moron knows he's being talked down to :)

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Much Love,
Your Favorite Crazy Woman XOXO

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Transition Is Just Another Word For Limbo

Living in PA and working in MD can be a real pain in the ass sometimes. For starters, if you don't leave at just the right time, you can be sitting in traffic for forever. And if you're running late due to oversleeping, then you're really late. None of this calling your boss and saying "I'm running 5 or 10 minutes late"... It's more like "I'll be in around 9:30 or 10:00a". And, if it snows? UGH - FUHGETABOUDIT!!!

However, you get use to it... And, if all goes smoothly, it can be a nice, relaxing ride. I live 50 miles from my office (about an hour each way - again, if all goes smoothly) and I like to use that time to relax, listen to music and/or... obsess.

Obsessing for me is more like a conversation with myself - out loud - literally. I mean seriously, how can the half of yourself that's listening hear you if the other half doesn't speak up? Don't act like you don't know what I mean.

This evening's ride home was just like that.

I started to bitch to myself about how my job was really pissing me off. Don't get me wrong, I like my job. I like what I do, [most of] the people I work with and more importantly, the paycheck that it provides. However, I work for Corporate America (sigh). And Corporate America is currently making it's way through a merger. Since I'm a clerk, I really don't have much to do except to sit back and wait it out. Leave the heavy lifting to the Higher Ups (and IT) and of course, do what's asked of me when it's asked. Got it - no problem!

BUT...

I have very little patience for the in-between... the transition!

     tran·si·tion 
     [tran-zish-uhn]
     –noun
        1. change or passage from one state or stage to another
        2. the period of time during which something changes from one state or stage to another


FYI - transition is just another word for limbo.

     lim·bo
     [lim-boh]
     –noun 
        1. an unknown intermediate place or condition between two extremes
        2. a place or state of imprisonment or confinement.


Am I right?

People leave, you pick up some extra work. After they leave, you still have questions but you end up having to figure it out for yourself because there's no one else to ask. The system slows down and it takes you two, three, four times longer than usual to get something done. New clerks need assistance in learning the process and you're pulled in another direction while all the other stuff is going on. Then you realize that the "new" clerks are slow to learn and of course, that's taking up even more of your time (and you want to scream at them). In the end, you're working an hour and a half later than usual just to get done the stuff that usually only takes half a day.

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The lesson of this story is, if you find someone that will pay you to stay home? Ask them if they have an opening for me.

Much Love,
Your favorite Crazy Woman XOXO

Monday, January 3, 2011

NEW YEAR'S EVE WEEKEND: 4 STARS (JUST FOR YOU, LINDSAY!!)

After 72 hours of hibernation, I have finally emerged to talk about it.

Hubby and I were supposed to spend Friday night (New Year's Eve) with my BFF and her fiance celebrating the end of 2010 by playing trivia games, eating lots of great food and drinking Fane (Fake Wine aka non-alcoholic - something I've never had before but was - oddly enough - looking forward to trying). However, it was not meant to be... Hubby was stone-cold-sick! Fatigued, sneezy, coughing, feverish. Need I say more? So, after telling my friend that we would not be joining them on New Years Eve, I promptly got into bed with hubby and stayed there with him all weekend (literally!). If my favorite person in the world is stuck in bed, well then so am I. The only times I got out of bed were to go to the bathroom, get food (the eating part was in bed as well), smoke the occasional cigarette and a short trip to Wal-Mart to buy a new hair dryer since my old one kicked the bucket. Surprisingly enough, Wal-Mart was calm and behaving itself except for the grown woman I saw walking out of the store texting and wearing a winter hat that looked like a lion. (I wanted to ask her if they had one as the Scarecrow or the Tin Man but I refrained. What I REALLY wanted to do was take a damn picture but, I have this overwhelming fear of getting caught and shanked.)

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I found this pic on the Internet but, this is the EXACT same hat I saw a GROWN WOMAN wearing in a manner that seemed to be... oblivious or... proudly?? I've been known to wear some goofy shit but... I would draw the line here (sigh).

So, other than that, we slept, talked, read, watched movies, texted our family and friends, Facebooked and ate in the comfort of our bed. To some people this sounds boring or uneventful. However, to me (other than Hubby getting sick or getting me sick on the near 3rd day) this was pure bliss!!! It was something that I think I, not only wanted but, needed for a long time.

Over the course of the weekend we watched EIGHT movies!! See list below:

  1. The Karate Kid (3 stars: This movie was verbatim of the original. I mean every scene was the same with the only differences being of location. Instead of Ralph Macchio moving from New Jersey to California, little Dre moved from California to China. Instead of Ralph hiding in a shower curtain costume and sneaking up with a hose in the bathroom on Johnny, little Dre hid behind a car in an alley and threw a bucket of water at his enemy. Are you catching my drift? The only thing good about it was the cute Will Smith off-spring and the oh-so-cool Jackie Chan. Other than that, save yourself the disappointment and stick to the 1980's original.)
  2. White Out (3 stars: Kate Beckinsale = No Biggie)
  3. My Sister's Keeper (4 stars: For anyone that read the book, I hope you'll agree with me in saying that this book should've been made into a two to four part mini-series instead of a two hour movie. Part of the book's allure was all of the short stories going on within it. The movie didn't quite capture the essence of the book and I don't like how they changed the ending in the movie. For this is the reason it didn't get 5 stars.)
  4. Easy A (4 stars: Funny actress takes on The Scarlet Letter - It was just too cute of a "tween" movie not to get 4 stars.)
  5. The A-Team (3 stars: Hot actors, good humor and great action. 'Nuff said.)
  6. Going The Distance (4 stars: I LOOOOOOOVE Drew Barrymore, Christina Applegate and Justin Long! Having those 3 together in this movie was a great combination of a cute and funny, romantic comedy.)
  7. Get Him To The Greek (Hubby picked this movie and I fell asleep halfway into it.)
  8. Why Did I Get Married Too? (5 stars: I have yet to be disappointed by a Tyler Perry drama flick. This sequel is better than the first. Janet Jackson's character finally broke down and went all psycho and of course Tasha Smith's character is a fucking trip! I hope I never have to be on the other side of her wrath.)

For those of you that don't know me, I am a total movie (and book) addict! I treasure DVDs and books like a pirate treasures his new found loot. This weekend was a great fix.

Honestly, in all my (almost) 33 years, I have never thought much of celebrating New Year's Eve. I have the worst time staying up until midnight (I was asleep by 9:30p this year), I hate crowds and don't like parties very much either. (If I were to be totally frank, I just don't like people, in general.) AND, I fear getting hit by some drunk dude en route to or from the holiday festivities. Hubby seems to think it would be much more fun if it were on say June 30th. It's no fun standing outside in the cold waiting for a fucking ball to drop. I, whole-heartedly, agree! In the past 10 years since my husband and I have been together, we've only gone out/celebrated once. A short dinner nearby our home at the time and it really wasn't that great of a meal. So, even though we didn't get to spend it with my girlfriend and her fiance, it was a usual New Year's Eve for us. I give it 4 stars. The only thing that would've made it better (5 stars) is if Hubby wasn't hacking up a lung. FYI - he's now feeling better.

So, starting tomorrow morning, it's back to the real world... Working, taking care of the house (which will be a whole other post, soon to come), getting back to the gym and everything else that entails being a productive member of society.

Have a Happy and Prosperous New Year!!

Much Love,
Your Favorite Crazy Woman XOXO